November 20, 2017

FOR YOUR EYES ONLY

Twilly’s Completely Harmless Holiday Shopping List

Oishii still needs....

• Turdraken
• Cranboggy Juice
• Whipped Seedspitter Balls

Ok. We are in the clear.

Battleon Resistance Communication Module

Agents of the Battleon Resistance have spotted EbilCorp bots scouting locations in town. Shopkeepers have been sent FREE crates full of this year’s hottest new Black Friday tech: the eWatch. EbilCorp never gives anything away for free. Ever. This is a trap. Be on guard. And whatever you do… do NOT buy the eWatch. Not until we know more. Additional messages will be posted here.

11.20.17

700 hours: Culinary Specialist Oishii begins preparations for the Harvest Feast on schedule. It is imperative that EbilCorp agents do not realize we know their plans.

900 hours: Zorbak has disappeared from his cage in Battleontown. In its place is a very lifelike dummy. This does not bode well.

1100 hours: Logistics Specialist Yulgar has been called to an Emergency Meeting of the Lorian InnKeepers and Crafters Kabal (LICK)... This organization is unknown to us. Agents dispatched to recover LS Yulgar while the imposter put in his place remains under surveillance.

1200 hours: EbilCorp's slogan is "EbilCorp. A name you can trust." I do. I trust them to corrupt all that is good and wholesome about our Harvest Feast. I have heard rumors that a drone has been made in Twilly's image. I doubt they'd create a Healbot, so... if it DOES exist, it's sure to be much more nefarious and consumer-centric.

1400 hours: Mmmm, mmm. you can smell Culinary Specialist Oishii's roast turdraken for the feast all the way across town. I am surprised the EbilCorp agents haven't followed their noses to find our base. Better engage the Smell-o-Shields to keep us hidden.

1500 hours: Twig keeps disappearing to check the lastest Black Friday and Cyber Monday sales on Oishii's Culinary Compotater. I keep telling him shopkeepers do not accept fish for goods.

1600 hours: Something is watching us... But our scouts have not found anyone. Or anything. The fur on the back of my neck is prickling. 

1900 hours: A squad of Guardian Tower knights are preparing for patrol through the town. They have been instructed not to "see" anything suspicious, but to just let their presence be known.

Note: EbilCorp agents all have augmented eyes. This font was designed to change encoded messages into completely harmless grocery items.